Anything But Ordinary
by ValoryAnnClark
Summary: SongFic. Bella is trying her hardest to get over Edward but with Jacob out of the picture also it's becoming harder. What will she do about it? Uses Avril Lavigne's Anything But Ordinary.


**A/N: Hey people! Felt like taking a break from everything else I was doing and writing a song fic. This would most likely take place sometime in **_**New Moon**_**just before she decides to go down to La Push and tell Jacob off for leaving her like he did. I'm not Stephanie Meyer and in no way do I own any of her work. I'm also not Avril Lavigne and didn't write **_**Anything But Ordinary**_**. So, my suggestion on how to read this is find the song somewhere, (YouTube, iTunes, Dizzler, Other) Play it, use the italicized lyrics as a reference to what is being sung and enjoy the story I found in the lyrics with the characters of the **_**Twilight**_** world. **

Anything But Ordinary

I lie in a ball under my covers. Why is this so hard for me? Why am I reacting this way?

_Sometimes I get so weird  
I even freak myself out_

_I laugh myself to sleep  
It's my lullaby_

_  
_He wouldn't like it if He saw me this way. He would hold me in His arms and tell me everything was going to work out. NO! I can't think like that. It hurts too much. I laugh at the lunacy I have been driven to.

_Sometimes I drive so fast  
just to feel the danger  
I wanna scream  
it makes me feel alive_

I want to hear His voice again, but with no help from Jacob possible, it didn't seem likely that I would be doing anything would make it possible anytime soon. My thoughts are getting dangerous again. It is too easy to think of bad things when I am alone without any distractions. It's hard to breath. I pull myself into a tighter ball, trying to regain control of my breathing again.

Is it enough to love?  
Is it enough to breathe?  
Somebody rip my heart out  
And leave me here to bleed  
is it enough to die?  
Somebody save my life  
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please

All I ever wanted was Him. Even now, when I knew He didn't want me the same way I wanted Him, I couldn't help but want Him back. Why did He have to leave? Why couldn't I have had a few more moments to say goodbye?

To walk within the lines  
would make my life so boring  
I want to know that I  
have been to the extreme

Maybe I could make it. Jacob makes me feel almost normal again! Maybe I could serve with his help. He certainly helps me hear Him even if he doesn't know it. He makes it easier. But that wasn't a safe subject either. Thinking of Jacob was just as hard as thinking of Him.

_  
So knock me off my feet  
Come on now give it to me  
anything to make me feel alive_

This pain was too much, but at least it was better than my zombie-like state. I can't go back to that. 

Is it enough to love?  
Is it enough to breathe?  
Somebody rip my heart out  
And leave me here to bleed  
is it enough to die?  
Somebody save my life  
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please.  
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please.

Why! Why was it that the slightest reminder of Him coagulated me in my tracks? I guess I know why. I want him so badly! He was the entire reason for my existence. 

Let down your defenses  
Use no common sense  
if you look you will see  
that this world is a beautiful  
accident, turbulent, succulent  
opulent permanent, no way  
I wanna taste it  
don't wanna waste it away

This isn't fair! Jacob shouldn't let her get this way! He knows how hard it is on me and he's abandoning me, it's not right! He has to know what he's desertion is doing to me! He shouldn't get away with this! I'm going to give him a piece of my mind the next time I see him.

Sometimes I get so weird  
I even freak myself out  
I laugh myself to sleep  
It's my lullaby

Why should I wait until he comes looking for me? I should go looking for him and tell him off now. I jump out of bed and run to my truck.

_  
Is it enough?  
Is it enough?  
Is it enough to breathe?  
Somebody rip my heart out  
And leave me here to bleed  
is it enough to die?  
Somebody save my life  
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please  
_

**A/N: Will I hope you like it! I had fun writing it. I would like to thank PurplezPretty for editing this for me. I really like this song for Bella. I know Lavigne isn't very popular with a lot of people but I think this has really good lyrics. Don't forget to review! Adding to favorites is always a nice thing too! If you like this, look up some of my other stuff. Ok, well Valory out! Kiss kiss bite and all that jazz!**_  
_


End file.
